In my last Spring Cleaning post I wrote about letting go of physical items to declutter your life and in this one I wanted to delve into letting go of nonphysical things.
Over the last couple of years, I’ve been struggling with what to do with my life and every time I thought about it, I would feel so confused. Although I’m not 100% out of that “lost” zone yet, I feel like I’ve learned a lot about myself and what I truly want out of life during these past few months. In order to do that though, I did have to let go of ideas or thoughts that I believed in for so long. The biggest one for me was school.
I’ve grown up always thinking that after high school I would go to CEGEP, finish that in two years, then go to university and finish my bachelor’s in three years, maybe do a master’s degree, then get married and have kids. I always had this idea of the path I wanted to follow. While I still want to finish school and get married and have kids, I’ve realized the path I thought I’d be walking may not exist; and if it does, it’s definitely not a straight line.
After CEGEP I went into journalism in university, and really hated it. I did it for three semesters and then decided to go back to my “science” roots (since I studied sciences in CEGEP) so I switched my major to biology. I tried one semester and totally hated it. When I think back to why I decided to try sciences again, I realize that I was caught up in the “what is expected of me” and “what it means to be successful”.
I was very dedicated to school when I was in high school, and I always wanted to get the highest grades possible. While my parents were always supportive of my choices and wanted me to do something that made me happy, I think that I was stuck on the idea that the only way to be successful and to show the world that you’re doing something good is by having a career in the sciences. Letting go of that idea over time was so liberating and it opened my mind up to a whole new world.
Letting go of the ideas that I have to have it all figured out, that I need to finish school as soon as possible and that I need to pursue a career in the sciences brought me so much inner peace. Taking a break from all the chaos of my thoughts gave me a chance to truly get to know myself and what I want.
I think that I still have a long way to go before knowing exactly what I’m meant to do, but I’m a lot closer than I was two months ago, even closer than I was two weeks ago. I’ve come up with so many ideas for a business, and I’ve thrown myself into a couple of new projects. With my always thinking that school was the end all, I’ve never really believed that I could be one to explore my options and even start a business. I do still think that school is important (I’ve recently applied to a new program that I think lies more within my interests), but I also know that I don’t have to JUST do school, that I can focus on other things simultaneously. In the past years, I’ve had an idea of how I want my life to be, and I’m definitely getting closer to making it that way.
With that being said, I encourage you to let go of all the thoughts you have that may be holding you back from truly figuring out what you want and doing what you truly want to do. It’s ok to take risks and to test the waters. Nothing is permanent and if one thing doesn’t work out, just be grateful that you tried it and move onto the next idea.
I hope that this post was useful to some of you and I’d love to hear your thoughts on letting go.